The Gypsy on Adventure

Harumph

Its my last free day before I am sent back to the salt mines of working. I am just not enjoying it anymore. It makes me sad. I had such a passion for my work, and I am now drained of it. So today I keep going back and forth between denial and dread! LOL 

I did not accomplish all that I wanted to on my week vacation, like cleaning my house, but who needs a really clean house? Well me, so I can have people over without shame! ha but I did do my laundry, clean my bathroom, actually threw some things away! go figure! Especially since I really don't use hair spray and some of the goop I bought thinking it would make me beautiful rather than the hag I am turning into! Dreams in the garbage! LOL The loose skin on my neck did NOT firm! LOL

I did spend some time in my garden, I have Crackers in her outside cage, because she has decided to be annoying lately...she is whining as I type because she wants back in! That is no! It is a nice day and you will LOVE the patio damn it! LOL AND stop screaming and getting on my last nerve!

I tried to find the 2nd skein of orange fire yarn I bought and misplaced since I have knit up the 1st skein and want to wear the damn scarf! A reason TO clean my studio! To find things! To finish things! LOL I am still binding the Lucy book, I put two more signatures in, but I get so sad I have to stop. Maybe this will get done! It makes me miss her when I work on this.

I have to get some balance back in my life. Since being on facebook I haven't really been keeping this up and if I don't keep this up why do I have it? I just paid for another year...I better use it! It just seems lately that every thing is speeding up, that there is no time to do all that I want to do, and that time is running out. I don't know why I feel that way, it scares me.  I just feel so mortal lately.  I guess I just have not stopped obsessing about death since Lucy was diagnosed with cancer in 2008. I have not been able to shake the sadness...and some times it just feels like it is coming out of my pours. And I am VERY weepy today. I keep tearing up...I am still so raw feeling. I think I hate hormones! especially when they are out of whack!

The dust and mildew in my bedroom is not helping with my health. I have been working for weeks on my room, to clean it up and make it more healthy. I think I am going to be forced to have help. I may capture WGB's daughter to help me purge the closet and forward clothes on to Good will and be done with the over crowding of clothes! And shoes! It is time to parr down...and get rid of some things...there is just too much still! I was able to clean up enough and open some windows to get some movement going. It was a rough Winter.  Since she is young and not in pain I will have her dust my room...I tried today and had to stop. I did vacuume and get my bed linens in the washer...I was able to clean around the windows and they are open and pulling a breeze through! I feel better about that! I think I may get it all together at some point! Wouldn't THAT be nice! I am starting to wonder if this DEEP sadness I can't seem to shake is depression from the thyroid being whacky...I know the anxiety is, so maybe this sadness is too. I hope these meds start to get balanced! I am tired of feeling this way!

I still cannot make a decision about my phone! I almost bought the Droid X yesterday, but then right when I was going to push the button, WGB said he was reading a post about how ONLY 20% of Droid users would buy another one! Whereas, 70% of iPhone users would buy another iPhone...I keep going back and forth on this! I love me some Apple products...but do I need to pay an average of 12% more for it when I have the iTouch and the iPad?

Ok...off to make some art now...

What is wrong with people?

Annoying conversation with CVS pharmacy:

I was wondering if you have a program to help people pay their meds who can't afford them?

 "yes we do"

How does it work?

"Well it depends but mostly it costs MORE to fill the prescriptions"

I just had to STARE at the person in disbelief, at which point I said, hum then I guess you DON'T have a program! Raised eye brow!

Is Mercury in Retrograde? Communication seems to be a problem! 

Can I just say AGAIN....I MISS MY LONGS DRUG STORE!!!!

Grrr

This is me in bitch mode!

I went to do an act of kindness for my daughter, I went to pay for her meds, and the pharmacy started to give me shit, this is what made me mad....they were ALL women! I am thinking good...my feminist side  coming out...but NO they are dismissing me until WGB asked WHY...suddenly every thing "I" was friggin asking was ok! They wanted me to leave my credit card on file! I don't do that for MY meds! That would be a hell no...so when I said what about cash...I get the stupid blank look until WGB asked WHY?

I was NOT happy! 

I think it was a cultural subservient thing with these women working there...and it just made me so spitting mad that they would do what a MAN asked but not what another WOMAN was asking! GRRRRR

Then I get this, oh she doesn't have insurance...I raised my eye brow...and instead of saying it just thought it, "Oh no! She HAS insurance I am just fucking rich and wanted to pay for it!!! Dumbass!" Instead I gave the RAISED EYE BROW look!

There would have been NO PROBLEM if I paid for the meds and LEFT WITH THEM! But because I wanted to pay for them and HAVE HER pick them up I got issues! Grrrr And they wonder WHY they have issues at that Pharmacy!

At the end I said to the gal, I have NEVER HEARD of anyone REFUSING money for their company! I figured in the end YOU would take it! And walked off! (Raising my eye brow all the way out the store!)

Then my daughter told me they gave her attitude! I will sleep on whether I will go to a HIGHER up the chain to chew on some ones ass tomorrow! WHY make things hard people? I just don't get it! I told HER not to make a stink...but I just may! I don't need her following my bad habit of being ASSERTIVE! RAISED EYE BROW!

Crime can be fast...

Watch your purses ladies! AND don't do my personal pet peeve which is leave your purse IN THE CART at a store!!! Gah

Check out this link!

Tired girl today...all the prep work I had to do is done! Celebration time!

I do ALL the prep work for the event...so I don't have to show up the day of! Giggle They ran me ragged today!  I am the one that provides the music too, so this year I bought 5-6 new Christmas CDs for them. Cracked me up I found a Billy Idol Christmas songs! LOL We are going to have a Billy Idol Christmas! Bahahahahaha

Today with all the crazy running around I got in 3,540 steps! Not bad!

Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens... Andy Rooney

Here are some photos from the Toy Drive at work, it is not all set up but will be by tomorrow morning when the doors open at 8 am and Santa walks between two Mounted Police Horses! I am praying we have enough toys to get us through the day this year! This year we got lots of teenager items compared to other years and that made me happy! Some times people forget tweens and teens!

A Strange Feeling...

Well one of the MOST influential women in my life, experienced a life altering event today, her retirement party. She has worked 30 years for the City and I am so freaked out that she is retired now! LOL Sondra was ALWAYS a beacon of light to me, and I followed her into working with the City. My teachers wanted me to work at different places like Wang (who no longer exist by the way) and I stuck to my guns and got hired with the City I was raised in. I was able to raise my kids, with health benefits and hey even my ex got to sue me for a good portion of my retirement ... so hey all is well and I have no regrets! 

It was a really nice lunch for her...the boys were there...and of course we were there. I am just grateful to this woman on SO many accounts! And it was a nice experience to be able to honor her!

When things would get bad and I needed to borrow $20 she would give it to me, when I wasn't eating, she would feed me. When I was going crazy she would talk to me. We have been through hell and back. It is amazing to me that she is now starting a different route in her life! I am excited for her...but I am sad too.

Sondra met me when I was 15 and leaving my parents house out of my window with my step monster pulling me back, she took me home and never got money for me. She always believed in me. She never judged me. I could say the most stupidest thing in the world and she would still love me through it. She was a beacon of light to me. She was able to steady me and move me passed not only my parents crap, but many life issues... She believed in me and kicked my ass some times. She was my cheer leader. I got through vocational school with her help, and I got my job with her encouragement and help. And I never embarrassed her...I have had my job for close to 25 years. But because she believed in me. In fact, she went with me to San Francisco with $50 to the fashion warehouses and I got my first work wardrobe... It is so hard to believe that she has been with the city for 30 years already and starting a new life...weird...and a strange feeling!

 

An Aha moment!

Here is the thing...I finally figured out I am PMSing...SIGH I hate menopause!!! Seems to happen only a couple times of year now and freaks me out when it does! Hot flashes...eating nothing but fried food and chocolate...and CRABBY! Yikes! THAT is what is wrong with me! I swear even that idiot behind me talking is like nails on a chalk board!! I NEVER PMS...Be glad you haven't had to be around me this week! Snort

Some of my clothes that I love are way too big now...but I am not boo-hooing, I am just being sensible until I loose enough, to buy some new clothes, I haven't had time to go to the thrift, so I am dealing! I was so happy this morning I even did some art BEFORE work! Giggle

I have started working on some of the mini Rolodex cards now...and they are getting really cool! I have been having a lot of fun making these cards!

AND Squeel! I got the Bags from SoManyIdeas for fruit and veggies! Trying to go green! No more plastic!

Tonight Bettie emailed me and told me that the shirts are ordered for the Ride to Remember! They look pretty cool!. John was a friend of mine at work and he died from Cancer due to being a Firefighter. Her son is riding the run in honor of his dad. It's been a long hard road, but Bettie was able to find a supportive man who loves her and they travel every where! They got married a few years ago! I miss her and hope to see her soon!

Ah an Adventure today!

Next time we will be prepared with our totes!
I know that this must be old hat to all of you, but today was the FIRST time that the WGB and I went to Whole foods! I am making changes in my life and this was one I had been wanting to make since they opened in my town. The WGB wanted an adventure and so we went! I was unprepared for what I saw! WOW...we have decided to make this store our main shopping experience! We were SO impressed with the milk, eggs and meat with NO hormones, anti-biotics, or other nasty things in it! We bought better eggs as well...from non-caged chickens! After learning this year about our farms I am so happy to make the changes!!!!

AND maybe now I will stop having bad reactions in my body including inflamation on my nerve! Anything to help with that! AND be able to loose the weight! I am excited for the changes!

Balance and the struggle for Creativity

So when you feel out of balance in your life what do YOU do to right yourself?

I know that my life is completely out of balance, partly health issues, that are starting to resolve slowly but surely, my issues will right themselves, but for now they have created issues in my life.  How do you deal with your life and your art.

It is like a house of cards for me right now...just blow and the house will fall down.

• Home
• Work
• Money
• Relationships
• Fun
• Art

Today I made a decision to NOT read ALL the emails in my box...I had over 100 emails in my inbox...and those that were jokes, pass ons, newsletters and unimportant (I hope) I deleted. There are 4 left in my box...

In my file get to when you can it has 200...I will be going through those and getting rid of them! And try to manage it a little better. I find that I am on the box too much. I have to get off it get my butt in the art chair and ART...

The muse left me for quite some time and now I have DEADLINE fever again...I hate this...when I am out of balance, my art suffers and when the muse doesn't kiss me I panic at the end.

I am in such a funk!

Hum... Should I ?

Hum...I know that my money is not in great shape right now...but I don't think I can pass this opportunity up!

2000 Chevy Monte Carlo VERY low miles!
12,000 miles for a 2000 car!!!! AND a low price...I almost can't afford to pass it up! My truck has been limping along, and this has a lot of really cool upgrades like heated seats!!!

• HD radio/CD/Tape player (Although I don't think I have any cassette tapes left)...here is a cool thing, it has the seek, volume control for the radio ON the steering wheel! LOL
• Moon Roof that you can crack open or push all the way back for it to be completely open (So kinda like a convertable, that I really want)                                          
• All leather interior and drives really smooth! 
• Leather seats that have a heater built in along with lumbar support! HEATED seats people!

Down side: Its not a really cool looking car...and I have to finance it...but it is LESS than my 93 Ford Explorer cost me in 1999, and it had 94,000 miles on it when I bought it! However, in my defense, it has been A GREAT little truck for me!  The down side for Michael was the fact that it is silver! He hates silver cars, he says on overcast raining days like today they disappear and you don't see them.

The funny thing he was telling me the guy ACROSS the street from us has the same kind of car! (Ha I never noticed!) Only his is a 2004! Same look, same deal on the inside but he does't have a moon roof! He was shocked when he heard the miles and how much Jim wants for the car!

I just have that gut feeling that I need to purchase this car...that my truck is limping and may start to dollar me to death AND did I say it has 12,000 miles on it and it is SEVEN years old???? Humf! How can I not get this? Michael and I drove it on a long test drive today and went to our favorate bakery in Burlingame, had breakfast and brought home goodies!!!