Ack...after I took my photo right before I was going to go to work, it hit hard and fast! I just couldn't go in during this stuff and lucky for me I had a doctor appt today...not that I am happy with her! Grrr! Seems I have VERTIGO! No reason why, and doc doesn't know how long this will last! Grrr!

I really should not be driving either...and she didn't even ask how I got there or how I was getting home!

My friend Dee gave me the best compliment of my life! That MY eyes reminded her of Liz's! She sent me these two photos and said they SO remind her of my eyes! Ha!

Ok in my brain some where, I KNOW I am aging. I know that I am 47. I can see the age marching across my face and hanging under my chin with more hair than I care to admit.

I wonder if my thyroid is off...she said I need every thing, total blood work, hormone levels, and that I need a mammogram, pap and the full work up. Sigh...

I tell her about the inside of my nose that seems to have scabs on it and bleeds...yup getting old sucks...MENOPAUSE...have I said that enough yet?

DRY DRY DRY skin... Yup MENOPAUSE...

But a blow to the ego...ouch...I say to the doc I think I was using cheap razors and have a burn (this is of course AFTER we are talking about my menopause issues) and I show her what I think are ingrown weird hair or some thing like cancer under my arm.

She stands back and says to me "I Know what that is!"

And the look on her face, softer, delicate YOUNGER THAN ME, says, "THOSE ARE AGE SPOTS!" And I hear it loud and amplified in my spinning head from vertigo, wondering what the f*ck is happening to me!!! Oh the good thing next visit she gets to BURN THEM OFF with liquid nytrogin!

Thats it I start to cry and she then puts me on anti-depressants that will help with the crying AND the hot flashes! F*ck! What a mess!

How do we do all of this with grace and acceptance when we feel like shit????

Have any tips send them!
Maybe I just need more wine! Giggle

So then I get this great response from SMI:
Um.........................
Number one....................YOu need to embrace your WOMAN-HOOD.
Everyone ages.............everyone get's older................TIs the circle of life..........You either love it.........or leave it.
Sun spots, age spots.........whatever you want to call them are from the SUN.................If you love it..............the sun will mark you.
Stop CRYIN................It's part of life girl.............and we are all in it together................Take the time you need to process this............and then EMBRACE IT...............shave more.............laser............Micro dermabrasion............WHATEVER............Just know............that YOU are you..................and nothing anyone says or points out will change it.............You are WOMAN...............BEAUTY..............CREAT IVE............COMPLETELY BEAUTIFUL...................Now...........Sna p out of it................Make a cocktail and CHEERS with me to GOOD HEALTH.........LOVE, LIFE and TOMORROW......................got it????????????????
XOXOOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOX O

My response:
Sniff....

Got it...going for the cocktail!

PS I LOVE YOU!

Many more responses came later from other friends...I am SURE glad I am not alone on this journey! Including my feelings of her prescribing anti-depressants...I am not taking them...I am going to fire her and find some one else!