I am trying to do things that are Life Affirming for me. Today I poured my uneasiness into drawing more. I am working on Eyes! I have to admit I am improving with more practice! It takes practice in anything to be good at it! I have decided to let myself be bad at it in order to get better at it!
I am hoping that I can do better with my journaling, adding my own drawings to it, AND I have always wanted to do sketching while I am out living my life! Like Danny Gregory! So fun! And I have to practice in order to allow the good to come through!
I like the bald girl with the piercing on her eyebrow! Giggle
Because I have been SO sad, WGB brought the air bed out for us to snuggle and watch a movie and let me cry next to him instead of alone in my room...what a sweetie! We had popcorn and watched Madegascar! (sp) I got to laugh! And it was good to just BE with him. The bottom line for me is to remember that HE is the gift of my life, we love each other so deeply it really doesn't matter what else is happening in my life, he is my rock...and my love!
We would like to live as we once lived,but history will not permit it. -John Fitzgerald Kennedy
I cannot get passed it, I am at a place where I am obsessively thinking of Lucy, just a few more days left of her precious life. As painful as it is, she does not want to see me. I feel lost. I just wish I could be next to her. But she doesn't want to see any one. I can understand it, but it just hurts. I am just not ready to let her go...
She has great pain just having Roy give her a sponge bath. There is no comfort for her to have any one touch her. She is mostly sleeping. Talks for 5 minutes and asks if it is alright that she sleeps. She told him she is looking for her mother and sister, they passed a long time ago. I hope her mother comes soon for her. I cannot stand the thought of her being in pain.
I am grateful that some one could love me like she does. I am grateful for the richness she brought to my life. I am grateful for the inspiration and how she opened up my soul to a friend when I was about to close down completely and never have friends again. She was a gift to me.
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