Oh! No wonder I have been profoundly sad and depressed this week...as of yesterday Lucy has been gone for 3 years...
Native American Prayer
I give you this one thought to keep -
I am with you still - I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the sweet uplifting rush,
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft starts that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone -
I am with you still in each new dawn.
Shit. REALLY? I am just dealing today with Lucy and my dad calls, it was THE worst 30 minutes...my grandma, the one who is 93, was diagnosed today with Pancreatic cancer...like Lucy.
REALLY? She is going to have to battle THAT demon? They can't do surgery to open the duct so they have to go down her throat to get to it and put a stent in IF they can... I am completely a mess! This is not good.
I told my dad to call the doctor and get anxiety medication for her, she can't sleep, she was always in denial that she would die at all, let alone by cancer! Tomorrow I have to find out who in their area does cremation because my dad has no idea, and we need to get things set into place before its too hard to handle. Reality bites. I just know we don't have much time. I am profoundly sad and depressed.
The process of letting go of our loved one's is hard, and it it hard for them to let go...When she talked to me it broke my heart! She said "I was so worried about having to tell you....I don't want to upset YOU!" OMG! She is the cutest!